Secret Hevan ACCESS Free Pair campaign - Charley sharing their heartfelt story "Hang in there. It does get easier!"

"The boxers made me feel so much more comfortable and allowed me to feel like myself. " 

My name is Charley and I identify as non-binary. I have Autism, BPD, ADHD, PTSD and chronic pain which affects me daily. This is a little bit about my life and how I came to be who I am now.

I have always had problems with my identity after coming out as a lesbian at 11 years old. It was tricky in an all girls school and I was bullied constantly. My family didn't understand me much either and at 16, I went into care. I didn't have much luck there either and was sexually assaulted but still unable to return to my family home. At 18, I got my own place and started looking into who I was more but ultimately, I was still young and enjoying my freedom was my priority. I eventually met someone and we settled down and had a baby together. Things were going great until I looked more into gender identity instead of just sexuality. I very quickly realised I am non-binary and I genuinely thought my girlfriend would be understanding but it wasn't that way. She left and took our boy with her. Despite trying to stay in my son's life, the UK legal system doesn't offer much support to second parents in this situation and my ex has been unwilling to let me see him. I knew I had to start again so I moved away from everything I knew and now live comfortably as my true self. I am with someone new who accepts me for who I am and has really helped me accept myself too. I feel much happier within myself and I finally feel like I know who I am. I 'came out' again to the few friends I kept and they have been so supportive! I honestly never thought life was able to be this good and I wish I could tell 15 year old me to hang in there because it does get easier. 

Periods have always been tricky for me because of my pain and autism. Pads irritate me both physically and mentally and tampons hurt to use. I also felt I had to compromise on being myself as I couldn't wear the underwear I usually do as they aren't designed for people who have periods. I looked Secret Hevan period pants on their website and thought those would really help with my struggles, but just couldn't afford it myself. 

I was sent a free pair Secret Hevan Reusable Period Packing Boxers via their ACCESS programme and these are amazing! They have got rid of that monthly worry as they are so practical! It was the first pair of underwear that I have found that can hold my packer and still be of use during my time of the month. I also have a heavy flow and the boxers didn't leak which was great! It made me feel so much more comfortable and didn't compromise my identity. They allowed me to feel like myself. The fit was true to size and the inner brief wasn't particularly noticeable against my skin - just felt like what I'd normally wear. These are definitely my favourite boxers now. 

It means a lot to me! 

Charley, England, UK